Some may be considering a relationship in your workplace; others may already be in one. When dating women in the workplace, you will ultimately face challenges that make keeping such relationships tough. If the connection is based on affection and familiarity, it is critical to establish respect and expectations early on.
You’ve developed feelings for someone at work. What are you going to do? Getting entangled in a relationship with a co-worker might be dangerous. So many things may go wrong. Moreover, most of our time is spent at work. It’s not surprising that many of us start dating women in the office, but is it a good idea?
Many of your co-workers, if you ask them if dating women in the workplace has a nice ring, many will laugh it off with the saying, “Never fish off the company pier.” But, as correct as that may sound in theory, the real world might have one or two things to say against that, as our emotions are not as black and white as the statement.
When peer attraction develops, most people find it challenging to make a choice. Is it diplomatic to proceed and hope for the best? On the other hand, do you disregard your emotions to conquer your attraction? To help you decide, we list the pros and cons of dating women in the workplace.
The Pros
Dating women in the workplace may be a problematic scenario. However, having someone nearby with whom you can spend time outside of work might be handy.
Let’s look at the disadvantages of dating someone you work with.
A Great Place to Get Used to Talking with Women.
Depending on your job, most workplaces have a good ratio of women to men, so you should have lots of women to practice your conversation skills on. If you’re shy, practice introducing yourself to a wide variety of women. You feel more confident in yourself when you practice more.
There’s Enough Time to Know Her Properly Without Pressure.
Spending extended time with a woman in your workplace gives you an opportunity to see her true personality. It can be an excellent place to discover who she really is, her background, and her goals in life. You’ll be able to determine her values and how trustworthy she is before you ask her out.
One of the main fears of a partner is not having enough time for each other, but when you both work in the same company, you appreciate how much time and attention the organization requires from the other person. Couples who work in the same workplace are more likely to comprehend one another’s duties and job expectations. Each partner knows the strain placed on them while they work together, which reduces the scope of disagreements.
It Can Hasten Up The Dating Phase.
The usual dating process takes time. It can take a lot of dates to determine whether she is the right girl for you or not. When you work with the woman you’re dating, you’ll be spending the entire work day with her, thus getting to know her more quickly.
You’ll Have Some Similar Interests.
Discussing with someone who doesn’t work with you about your job can get challenging for them to relate to your situation or even give you a toss.
You won’t have to be bothered with the somewhat provocative questions.
No more “Wait, who’s Maria again?” or “Sorry, what did Jonathan do?” No doubt, emotional release can be achieved in record time when you don’t have to labor over the details.
When you work with the woman you’re dating, she can sympathize with the highs and lows of your work life because she’ll have experienced some of what you’re talking about and know who you work with. If you’ve got a problem, she’ll be able to give you more relevant advice instead of just guessing what you’re going through.
The Cons
Co-workers spend between 20 and 60 hours every week together. Understandably, an attraction would form. Some workplaces have policies prohibiting employees from dating colleagues. It might offer some challenges when a relationship or romance occurs between two employees.
When you are dating women in the workplace, there are several issues that might need to be attended to. Let’s look at the disadvantages of dating someone you work with.
It May Be Against Company Policy.
What is your company’s policy regarding inter-company dating? Some companies discourage or even ban inter-office dating altogether. If your workplace enforces a policy against dating colleagues, then it is best to respect their rules. If you try to get around it and they find out, you and your lady could end up getting fired.
You Sacrifice Your Personal Life.
People gossip and rumors spread, especially when there’s a chance to gain an advantage over someone else by spreading negative information about them. People will whisper things behind your back that may or may not be true. Even if you decide to be open about your relationship to keep rumors to a minimum, people will still gossip – there’s no getting away from it. An office relationship could also incite jealousy—someone may have a crush on the woman you’re dating or may feel that you have an unfair advantage politically because of who you date.
You’ll Be Under Greater Scrutiny.
You’ll both be examined more closely by your colleagues and bosses. You’ll become subject to accusations of favoritism from co-workers when it comes to promotions and bonuses—especially if one of you is a boss to the other.
You May Be Subject To Sexual Harassment Complaints.
If your relationship ends, you may find that you’re the subject of a sexual harassment complaint. Not only could it affect the company you work for, but it could also ruin your reputation with future employers.
Usually, there’s little or no proof behind such allegations, but even the slightest suggestion of sexual harassment will land you in trouble. Whether you like to admit it or not, you could lose your job or damage potential promotion opportunities.
You May Spend Too Much Time Together.
A lot of time spent together might get tiresome and boring after a while. Meeting your beloved daily might sometimes take the luster out of the relationship. The thrill of meeting your sweetheart at work eventually disappears. Then, inadvertently, sentiments of love are replaced by negative sensations that arise due to a lack of space in the relationship.
When in a relationship, there’ll be times when you’ll want your own space. If you work with the woman you’re dating, your own space could become scarce.
But what if you truly prefer some alone time with your co-workers? The truth is that you may love someone without having to spend every waking minute with them. As the saying goes, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
In fact, time apart may be beneficial to your relationship.
Most people prefer not to spend every moment together, but if you’re working in the same office, you’ll see a lot of each other. If you date a work colleague, make sure you allow for some personal time.
If You Break Up, Things May Become Complicated.
Breakups are never fun, and running into your ex-girlfriend is always an awkward situation. Now imagine that your ex is one of your colleagues that you see every day. You won’t be able to escape, and you may have to face the prospect of her dating new men, which probably won’t feel that good.
While dating someone at your company may seem appealing since you see them daily, it might become a nightmare if the two of you split up. If you were the one that initiated the breakup, you might be at the receiving end of harsh comments from your co-workers. The sensation of not wanting to go to work to see your ex may sneak in and lead to poor performance at work, hurting your career.
Don’t be surprised if she tells your work colleagues all the bad things you said or did to her. This could damage your reputation, with colleagues and bosses looking at you in a negative light.
Your Take Home
Many couples meet at work and have great relationships. However, before you begin, make sure you carefully weigh up all the pros and cons before choosing to date women in the workplace.
It surely won’t take long until your co-workers discover that you are in the “dating women in the workplace” pool. However, it is advised that you maintain a professional conduct. Respect her privacy, and don’t tell your buddies the juicy information. Furthermore, excessive flirtation makes some individuals uncomfortable and reflects negatively on your professional approach.
Tell her you misjudged the scenario if she rejects your overtures during the date. Be mature about it and maintain good working relationships. She won’t make a huge deal about it if you don’t.
